Y'all don't even know how BIG, like GINORMOUS, this is. To say I have been terrified of doing this part of Dempsey care is a gross understatement.
I was so scared of it I ran, almost literally, away and made a nurse's assistant do it because I couldn't stand the thought of watching my baby in any more pain.
My physical being felt weak and empty at the thought of bath time. As time progressed Jake started doing it but I still left the room.
Then, yesterday, Jake and I fid it together. I actually helped a little. It wasn't as bad as I had envisioned. Still scary but no longer terrifying.
Today, Jake is away doing his much needed self-care and I felt compelled to take on this task ALONE. Crazy, right?! Yes. Crazy. I just couldn't stomach the thought of leaving that for Jake after him not getting away from hospital yesterday. In a way I saw this as a means of blessing my amazing husband. It's incredible what you will do for a good man like my husband. I just want him to be able to relax as much as possible.
So, all this to say I DID IT AND SURVIVED. Praise God. Strength is returning. Empowerment is slowly coming. Everything we need in the amounts we can handle when we need. God is so good.
Prayer request: Please pray that confidnce continues to grow. Pray for miraculous healing. Pray for a miraculously easy journey through leukemia gor Dempsey. Pray lives are changed and eternity gains some more members. ❤️
Saturday, April 16, 2016
Report
Dempsey had a good night. Praise God. Jake had strange dreams and needed to help Dempsey go potty more often than usual. He also has a touchy stomach right now. Pray for Jake- that his stomach would right itself, sleep would be sound and restful tonight, and his daddy heart be protected.
Dempsey had his room decorated by three members of the National League of Young Men. Star Wars everywhere. 💙 They even brought RED streamers. *thumbs up* Pray for that group of young men who are growing in so many ways through experiences like this.
Sawyer wanted to come back to the hospital with me this morning. Dempsey had been wanting to play Lego wii games with brother because mommy and daddy aren't good at those games. Pray that Sawyer will remain as strong as he has been, as prayerful as he needs to be, and protected from negative thoughts and feelings.
Jake will drop Sawyer off at church with Granny and Granddad this afternoon on his way to start self-care time. Pray that Jake is renewed and rejeuvenated during his hours away. That time is a big need of his.
Dempsey is currently receiving more platelets. They had to get them from the Red Cross because the hospital was out. Pray that the hospital's reserves will build up so no time is wasted. Pray about donating platelets yourself. They are a HUGE need here in the oncology ward.
Granny and Granddad are getting a much needed break. They would never ask for a break but we know it is different living with your grandson than just watching him for a small portion of the normal week. Pray that God sustains them, keeps them healthy, and that they don't feel super limited by our needing them so much during this time.
Prayer requests: Pray that God goes before us and provides what we need when we need it. Pray for a smooth journey through leukemia. Pray for no negative side effects. Pray that the risks are never made into real experiences. Pray for our confidence when Dempsey can come home. Pray that hus infection goes away completely. Pray for no fevers, no reactions to anything going in his body, that his port is never infected, that his vitals are always PERFECT, and that his labs always come back PERFECT. We need PERFECT!!
Dempsey had his room decorated by three members of the National League of Young Men. Star Wars everywhere. 💙 They even brought RED streamers. *thumbs up* Pray for that group of young men who are growing in so many ways through experiences like this.
Sawyer wanted to come back to the hospital with me this morning. Dempsey had been wanting to play Lego wii games with brother because mommy and daddy aren't good at those games. Pray that Sawyer will remain as strong as he has been, as prayerful as he needs to be, and protected from negative thoughts and feelings.
Jake will drop Sawyer off at church with Granny and Granddad this afternoon on his way to start self-care time. Pray that Jake is renewed and rejeuvenated during his hours away. That time is a big need of his.
Dempsey is currently receiving more platelets. They had to get them from the Red Cross because the hospital was out. Pray that the hospital's reserves will build up so no time is wasted. Pray about donating platelets yourself. They are a HUGE need here in the oncology ward.
Granny and Granddad are getting a much needed break. They would never ask for a break but we know it is different living with your grandson than just watching him for a small portion of the normal week. Pray that God sustains them, keeps them healthy, and that they don't feel super limited by our needing them so much during this time.
Prayer requests: Pray that God goes before us and provides what we need when we need it. Pray for a smooth journey through leukemia. Pray for no negative side effects. Pray that the risks are never made into real experiences. Pray for our confidence when Dempsey can come home. Pray that hus infection goes away completely. Pray for no fevers, no reactions to anything going in his body, that his port is never infected, that his vitals are always PERFECT, and that his labs always come back PERFECT. We need PERFECT!!
Friday, April 15, 2016
Today's Happenings
Dempsey rode a trike this morning! Praise God. This was some physical therapy fun.
He did a bit more walking today too. Praise God. He still walks awkwardly but he's walking. Pray that we can work with him to strengthen his muscles again and get him back to normal.
He pooped! Praise God. It had been over 48 hours. Constipation is a BIG possibility and problem during treatment. Pray against this complication.
He ate a cheeseburger and fries w/ ketchup. Praise God. He had a good appetite by dinner time. Pray his appetite will remain steady and his digestion smooth.
He got to meet some Angel chicks. (The pic will come later, it's on Jake's phone.)
He experienced Turtle Talk on the second floor. Super fun interactive digital "show". Praise God he was able to venture out through the hospital.
He had brother visit, hang out, and play for a few hours. The laughter was heart-warming. Praise God. Pray that these visits help his psyche and overall well-being.
We had family dinner. Praise God. The four of us together, eating a meal, and watching an episode of Little House on the Prairie. Such a blessing so many take for granted. Pray we never take another family meal for granted but always remember to cherish each day together.
He took a nap this afternoon. Praise God. It's good for him to rest. Pray that he doesn't become lethargic and his naps are always healthful and positively productive.
He is amaing at taking his oral meds. Pray that we can teach him to take pills because he will ne taking A TON of them over the next 3 yrs-3 mos.
Jake didn't get much time away from hospital today. Pray that this isn't a negative for him and that he can obtain restful sleep tonight. We'll try to get him out for a few hours tomorrow.
Sawyer came home with me tonight. First night in his own bed in 2 weeks. Praise God. Pray that he will continue to handle these present changes like the champ he is. It's tough and he's doing wonderfully.
We (Jake, me, my folks) had a meeting to discuss home care for Dempsey. It was overwhelming but it also brought hope. Pray that we will feel confident and never need to use the knowledge we obtained in that meeting.
Coming up: Monday brings another surgery- marrow biopsy and LP (I think). I'm not exactly sure what they are looking for but he will have one more after this in this INDUCTION phase of treatment. Go before us in prayer and ask God to smooth the path. Pray against pain from surgery. Pray against anesthesia complications. Pray for positive attitudes and no fear. Pray that Jake and I stay strong and our knees hold us up. Pray for wisdom, faith, confidence, resilliance.
More gifts received today. THANK YOU so much for your thoughtfulness and generosity!
He did a bit more walking today too. Praise God. He still walks awkwardly but he's walking. Pray that we can work with him to strengthen his muscles again and get him back to normal.
He pooped! Praise God. It had been over 48 hours. Constipation is a BIG possibility and problem during treatment. Pray against this complication.
He ate a cheeseburger and fries w/ ketchup. Praise God. He had a good appetite by dinner time. Pray his appetite will remain steady and his digestion smooth.
He got to meet some Angel chicks. (The pic will come later, it's on Jake's phone.)
He experienced Turtle Talk on the second floor. Super fun interactive digital "show". Praise God he was able to venture out through the hospital.
He had brother visit, hang out, and play for a few hours. The laughter was heart-warming. Praise God. Pray that these visits help his psyche and overall well-being.
We had family dinner. Praise God. The four of us together, eating a meal, and watching an episode of Little House on the Prairie. Such a blessing so many take for granted. Pray we never take another family meal for granted but always remember to cherish each day together.
He took a nap this afternoon. Praise God. It's good for him to rest. Pray that he doesn't become lethargic and his naps are always healthful and positively productive.
He is amaing at taking his oral meds. Pray that we can teach him to take pills because he will ne taking A TON of them over the next 3 yrs-3 mos.
Jake didn't get much time away from hospital today. Pray that this isn't a negative for him and that he can obtain restful sleep tonight. We'll try to get him out for a few hours tomorrow.
Sawyer came home with me tonight. First night in his own bed in 2 weeks. Praise God. Pray that he will continue to handle these present changes like the champ he is. It's tough and he's doing wonderfully.
We (Jake, me, my folks) had a meeting to discuss home care for Dempsey. It was overwhelming but it also brought hope. Pray that we will feel confident and never need to use the knowledge we obtained in that meeting.
Coming up: Monday brings another surgery- marrow biopsy and LP (I think). I'm not exactly sure what they are looking for but he will have one more after this in this INDUCTION phase of treatment. Go before us in prayer and ask God to smooth the path. Pray against pain from surgery. Pray against anesthesia complications. Pray for positive attitudes and no fear. Pray that Jake and I stay strong and our knees hold us up. Pray for wisdom, faith, confidence, resilliance.
More gifts received today. THANK YOU so much for your thoughtfulness and generosity!
Thursday, April 14, 2016
Gifts
THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO HAS BLESSED US IN TANGIBLE WAYS!!!!
I am keeping a log, the best I can. I don't want to start naming names because I'm sure I'll miss someone and I don't want to accidentally offend anyone. I'm sure I've name dropped on here before I had the presence of mind to not do that. Forgive me.
Just know, you non-anonymous givers are not going unnoticed or unappreciated. This is our out-loud declaration of thanks to you for your generosity.
To all you anonymous givers: THANK YOU JUST THE SAME!! We appreciate you. We value you. We are grateful for your generosity. We are slightly irked that we will not be able to thank you in person. :-)
THANK YOU FOR BLESSING AND LOVING OUR FAMILY. YOUR SUPPORT MATTERS. IT IS FELT. WE LOVE AND APPRECIATE YOU!
Update of Day 4
Second dose of chemo went well. Praise God!
Dempsey's body is tolerating the treatment "really well" according to the nurses. Praise God.
He is increasingly sensitive to temperature. Pray that this doesn't cause him too many problems and that he adapts.
He had is needle and dressing changed today. This was PAINFUL. Pray for toughened nerves and for his mind to forget the pain.
The silver lining to the new needle is that the lab draws are much easier which means no additional medicine is needed. Praise God.
He slept a lot today. This is normal. Pray that through his naps his schedule doesn't get too far off.
He at more today than yesterday. Praise God. Pray for poop. It's been two days since his bowels moved and we need it to be more frequent to avoid constipation. Thankfully he is fully hydrated.
He did NOT have a dose of dilaudid (really good pain med- also can cause constipation) today. Praise God.
He WALKED today!! Praise God. Not a marathon or anything but quite a few steps around our room. Praise God.
Bath time was a success. Praise God. Jake is AMAZING. How he can just "do" certain things amazes me. I'm thanking God for making us different in ways that compliment each other. It's a beautiful, albeit confusing, thing. On a related note, I survived being in the same room and even participating in bath time. My confidence level in this area had been nil... not it's just slightly more than nil.
Technology is still a key distraction. Praise God we have distractions!!
I finished reading the Batman story book a friend gave us. Little man is addicted to super heroes right now.
Dempsey said he hates me. Praise God for little boys feeling safe enough to voice even the harshest of feelings. By the time I asked him "Do you still hate me?" he was genuinely able to say "No, I love you again." as he touched my face with his little hand and we sat there, head to head. Sweet moments.
Prayer request(s): we are starting to crack under the weight of what it will require to care for Dempsey throughout this journey. We are feeling unprepared to bring a boy home who might still very well be on IV antibiotics. Not gonna lie, this mama is freaking out about that possibility. There is a strange comfort of being in the hospital when you've got tubes dangling. Continue to pray over our marriage. This is HARD. It's hard on so many levels and in ways we haven't even realized yet. Pray for Sawyer's heart. I know this is hard on him and he is handling it like a champ! Pray that the spoiling he's getting right now don't change his sweet, tender heart. Pray for his protection on all fronts. We never want him to feel forgotten, left out, unloved... Pray for our physical health. We NEED to remain healthy so we can care for Dempsey and remain in his presence. Pray for my physical being. The physiological manifestations of emotions run amuck are taking a toll. I remain healthy but feel exhausted all the time, no matter how much sleep I get. Pray for Jake and he bears the most time at the hospital. Pray that his sleep is always deeply restful and renewing. Pray that he is able to process all of this in his own way and in his own time. Pray that I am sensitive to his needs, voiced and unvoiced.
We love you. We need you. We are grateful for you. May God bless you richly as you support us and beyond.
Dempsey's body is tolerating the treatment "really well" according to the nurses. Praise God.
He is increasingly sensitive to temperature. Pray that this doesn't cause him too many problems and that he adapts.
He had is needle and dressing changed today. This was PAINFUL. Pray for toughened nerves and for his mind to forget the pain.
The silver lining to the new needle is that the lab draws are much easier which means no additional medicine is needed. Praise God.
He slept a lot today. This is normal. Pray that through his naps his schedule doesn't get too far off.
He at more today than yesterday. Praise God. Pray for poop. It's been two days since his bowels moved and we need it to be more frequent to avoid constipation. Thankfully he is fully hydrated.
He did NOT have a dose of dilaudid (really good pain med- also can cause constipation) today. Praise God.
He WALKED today!! Praise God. Not a marathon or anything but quite a few steps around our room. Praise God.
Bath time was a success. Praise God. Jake is AMAZING. How he can just "do" certain things amazes me. I'm thanking God for making us different in ways that compliment each other. It's a beautiful, albeit confusing, thing. On a related note, I survived being in the same room and even participating in bath time. My confidence level in this area had been nil... not it's just slightly more than nil.
Technology is still a key distraction. Praise God we have distractions!!
I finished reading the Batman story book a friend gave us. Little man is addicted to super heroes right now.
Dempsey said he hates me. Praise God for little boys feeling safe enough to voice even the harshest of feelings. By the time I asked him "Do you still hate me?" he was genuinely able to say "No, I love you again." as he touched my face with his little hand and we sat there, head to head. Sweet moments.
Prayer request(s): we are starting to crack under the weight of what it will require to care for Dempsey throughout this journey. We are feeling unprepared to bring a boy home who might still very well be on IV antibiotics. Not gonna lie, this mama is freaking out about that possibility. There is a strange comfort of being in the hospital when you've got tubes dangling. Continue to pray over our marriage. This is HARD. It's hard on so many levels and in ways we haven't even realized yet. Pray for Sawyer's heart. I know this is hard on him and he is handling it like a champ! Pray that the spoiling he's getting right now don't change his sweet, tender heart. Pray for his protection on all fronts. We never want him to feel forgotten, left out, unloved... Pray for our physical health. We NEED to remain healthy so we can care for Dempsey and remain in his presence. Pray for my physical being. The physiological manifestations of emotions run amuck are taking a toll. I remain healthy but feel exhausted all the time, no matter how much sleep I get. Pray for Jake and he bears the most time at the hospital. Pray that his sleep is always deeply restful and renewing. Pray that he is able to process all of this in his own way and in his own time. Pray that I am sensitive to his needs, voiced and unvoiced.
We love you. We need you. We are grateful for you. May God bless you richly as you support us and beyond.
Chemo 2
Lord Jesus,
Please protect my baby during this infusion. Keep his vitals steady. I pray against side effects and risks. Keep him happy and distracted. I pray that you would heal my baby, Lord. Whether it be by miracle or drugs, Lord. May your prayer warriors never grow weary of carrying our family through this. Fulfill our needs that we don't think to ask for. Amen
Please protect my baby during this infusion. Keep his vitals steady. I pray against side effects and risks. Keep him happy and distracted. I pray that you would heal my baby, Lord. Whether it be by miracle or drugs, Lord. May your prayer warriors never grow weary of carrying our family through this. Fulfill our needs that we don't think to ask for. Amen
Day 4
Jake was told today is actually Day 4 of treatment. That means another dose. I believe today it's the PEG one. You can read about that on a previous post called The Plan | The Meds | Prayer Needed.
Pray that his body accepts the drug(s). Pray against negative side effects. Pray for strength. Pray for courage. Pray to protect his mind & body.
Ashley from Child Life was explaining today's happenings to him. Today he also gets a new needle (outer part of his port) and nee dressings for it. This will be PAINFUL for him because of the adhesive and his really sensitive skin. Pray against pain!
Again, and as always, thank you for your prayers! We need them. We are so grateful for your support.
PS- Sawyer is livin it up at Disneyland today with friends. So blessed to have people lovin on and caring for our healthy Sawyer when we can't, to that degree.
Pray that his body accepts the drug(s). Pray against negative side effects. Pray for strength. Pray for courage. Pray to protect his mind & body.
Ashley from Child Life was explaining today's happenings to him. Today he also gets a new needle (outer part of his port) and nee dressings for it. This will be PAINFUL for him because of the adhesive and his really sensitive skin. Pray against pain!
Again, and as always, thank you for your prayers! We need them. We are so grateful for your support.
PS- Sawyer is livin it up at Disneyland today with friends. So blessed to have people lovin on and caring for our healthy Sawyer when we can't, to that degree.
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
The Plan | The Meds | Prayer Needed
For those of you who have wanted some details about Dempsey's "treatment", here ya go.
First photo is the Plan, the road map of his treatment. The whats and whens of medicines. I can't go into more detail because I have reached a limit and cannot process all the details to their full extent. One day I will... it is not today.
Second photo is the type of "port" Dempsey has. This is how he will receive chemo and other drugs (so many drugs) and how they will draw labs (so many labs).
The rest are the drugs for his treatment plan. Notice the side effects.
PRAYER REQUESTS:
If we must go through this pray that this plan works perfectly. Pray that Dempsey experiences NO symptoms- if he has symptoms pray they are not severe and that they are short-lived. Pray that Dempsey accepts this reality for as long as it's around. Pray for courage, strength, vitality. Pray for this treatment to yield better than the best results! We need his numbers to be PERFECT! Nothing short of perfect is acceptable because it will change his "risk" label. Currently he is "standard risk". We want this label to remain and not be upgraded.
Thank you for your prayers and support. We feel you, your petitions on our behalf. We need them still. We love you all and value you.
First photo is the Plan, the road map of his treatment. The whats and whens of medicines. I can't go into more detail because I have reached a limit and cannot process all the details to their full extent. One day I will... it is not today.
Second photo is the type of "port" Dempsey has. This is how he will receive chemo and other drugs (so many drugs) and how they will draw labs (so many labs).
The rest are the drugs for his treatment plan. Notice the side effects.
PRAYER REQUESTS:
If we must go through this pray that this plan works perfectly. Pray that Dempsey experiences NO symptoms- if he has symptoms pray they are not severe and that they are short-lived. Pray that Dempsey accepts this reality for as long as it's around. Pray for courage, strength, vitality. Pray for this treatment to yield better than the best results! We need his numbers to be PERFECT! Nothing short of perfect is acceptable because it will change his "risk" label. Currently he is "standard risk". We want this label to remain and not be upgraded.
Thank you for your prayers and support. We feel you, your petitions on our behalf. We need them still. We love you all and value you.
All Boy ❤️
Playing Lego Star Wars on the wii. He wanted to teach me. I'm like, "Um, well, I have WAY more fun watching you have fun."
It Was A Good Night
Jake gave me a great report from last night.
This is a HUGE answer to prayer(s).
No fever. Praise God. Keep praying against fevers, we don't like fevers.
Peed once, at 6am, needed to change sheets and chonies. No biggie.
Dentists visited this morning. All looks good. Praise God.
Doggy visit this morning. Dempsey met Berkeley, a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel. Furry blessings.
Had a visit from Dave and Trevor from Eastside.
He's currently playing Mario Kart by self on the Wii. We love him happy at tech distracted.
His blood pressure is high right now. Pray it levels off and maintains ideal numbers.
Pray against negative side effects of chemo.
Pray for symptoms to stay at bay.
Coral Kenagy
https://www.gofundme.com/dempseysjourney
http://dempseyupdates.blogspot.com/
1 John 4:19
"We love because HE first loved us."
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