Dear Dempsey

Dear Dempsey,

In church this passed Saturday evening Pastor Gene asked us "If you knew you were giving your Last Lecture, what would you talk about?" This really got me thinking. It made me wonder about what I felt were the most important things I would want to tell you.  Here are a few of them, in no particular order.

LOVE GOD
Dempsey, this is the most important thing for you to know. Matthew 22:37 says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind." It is my deepest prayer that you would read the Bible and really learn what it means to have a relationship with Jesus Christ. It is not about what is in your head, it is about what is in your heart.

MIND YOUR MANNERS


LOVE DEEPLY
My son, loving deeply doesn't mean making people or yourself happy. It means caring enough about people or yourself to do what is right in God's eyes. Sometimes this will be hard. Other times it will be easy. People are more than skin and bones. They are more than the bad choices they have made. They are sons and daughters of God and some don't know it yet. Love them. Care about their soul. Care about their eternity. See them through God's eyes, my son, and then you will be able to love those who challenge you the most.

Loving your (future) wife does not mean allowing her to walk all over you or denying yourself everything. You are called, as a Christian, to love her "as Christ loved the church". This doesn't mean Christ simply went to church and had fun. No. It means Christ gave his all to the betterment of the church. He died for the church. I pray that as you grow you will look for a woman of godly character who challenges you to be an even more godly man. The more in tune with Christ you are, Dempsey, the more you can help your wife grow in Christlikeness. Grow together. Always treat her with respect. Allow yourself to see her as a treasure that God has given to you to love, honor, and care for. I pray that you will have children with her and that she will be a wonderful mother and you a wonderful father.

GIVE GRACE

HAVE FUN
Laugh hard and often. Laughter is good for the soul and it helps keep life enjoyable.  As you laugh, may it never be at the expense of someone else. Don't laugh at someone... laugh with them. You will understand this more and more as you get older.
Play. Find activities that bring you joy and do those- in moderation if it's something like the Wii. Remember our saying, "Work hard, play hard, rest hard." It's important to earn your play with hard work. The fun is more fun after it has been earned.  Don't take life so seriously that you can't laugh at it. Once you stop laughing you stop truly living.

PRAY
When life gets hard, pray. When life is going well, pray. When you are sad, pray. When you are happy, pray. Don't pray only when you want God to give you something. Praise Him for the things he has given you. There is so much to be thankful for and humans easily forget to give thanks because we are selfish beings. Give praise even for the trials of life because through them we grow and experience God in deeper ways.

REST
This world prides itself on busyness. Don't be sucked into that charade, Dempsey. Busyness does not equal importance. Busyness is Satan's way of distracting people from communing with the Creator, God. God designed us for community but the devil works to tear that apart. Do not over program your life to the point where you are always stressed, never rest, and think your worth is greater because your calendar is full. God rested on the seventh day of creation. He modeled what life should look like- that we should have a Sabbath. Follow HIS model and you will find joy and meaning.

BE GENEROUS
Everything we have comes from God. So, why not share His riches with others. This doesn't mean give everything away, although if you feel He is asking that of you then go right ahead. Be generous with your words of praise to God, your words of affirmation to your loved ones, your love for people, your time with family and friends, your giving to those causes that move you... Generosity means giving without expecting something in return. It means that once you give whatever you choose to give you let it go completely and let God take it an multiply it for His Kingdom. Be careful with your generosity because people will manipulate you, so I pray for you a discerning heart in those times.

ASK QUESTIONS
There is nothing wrong with asking questions. Some people think they know everything... they don't. Don't be one of those people, Dempsey. There is much wisdom out there and I pray you never get tired of learning. Life is full of information and experiences and questions are a powerful tool. Don't just ask the questions though. Listen to the answer and hide it in your mind for use in the future. Do not be ashamed to raise your hand. Be confident in yourself and acknowledge what you do not know or understand and then seek to understand it.

TELL THE TRUTH
At all costs, tell the truth. No matter what happens to you or what people say/ do, tell the truth. If you always tell the truth then guilt will not cripple you. Shame will not follow you. Honor will be your friend and defend you. God will delight in you. It is far easier to tell the truth than to live with lies hanging over your head and being woven through your life.

KEEP IT SIMPLE
Complexity does not equal value. A simple life is meaningful and often times more joyful. Do not acquire too much material possessions because they do not satisfy your soul. They simply collect dust and provide a distraction for a time.

STUFF DOESN'T MATTER, PEOPLE DO
Relationships are what's important. Think about this: what was more important to you, time you spent playing with Dad and me, or the stuff you had? The stuff can be fun but it is more fun when shared with someone. It's okay to have stuff... just don't let stuff replace people. You were designed for community and that requires people. Get to know people, Dempsey. Love them. Share life with them. Be there for them. People matter.

YOU MAKE ME PROUD
I am proud to be your mother!

MOST IMPORTANT: REMEMBER, ALWAYS, I LOVE YOU!!!!