Biggest Need

MONEY

It's not glamorous. It's not pretty. It's not fun. It's not creative. It's not ingenious. It's not smart. It's not comical.

It is endearing. It is powerful. It is helpful. It is necessary. It is provision. It is humbling. It is impactful. It is peace-providing.

You have two ways you can give: YouCaring & PayPal

Saturday, May 14, 2016

Pics of Life

New Wheels

Dempsey got his TRYKE today! Such a bittersweet time. Bitter that he even needs it and sweet because YOU made it happen. What a blessing! Thank you. Thank you, so much!!

He wasn't too enthused about this piece of equipment. He wanted his "other tricycle". Kids want what kids want, ya know. He wants what he knows. I feel that.

Jake had him ise it this afternoon and when I saw him walking, post-ride, I could already see improvement. He looked stronger and his posture was improved. A+.

I look forward to seeing him grow in strength and mobility because of this trike. Thank you, again. We wouldn't have this much-needed tool if it wasn't for you.
The photos are from when he and I picked it up from SoCalTryker in Lakewood this morning.




Friday, May 13, 2016

God's Provision

When I find myself in the midst of circumstances that seem surreal and unbearable, I work to look back to see God's handiwork in preparing me for the situation at hand.  So, that's what this post is going to be about- what I see as I look back over the years leading up to Dempsey's cancer journey.

Going WAY back, I remember always having reservations about doctors. Something inside me just did not understand the logic behind synthetic drugs being used for "healing". Still don't. That feeling helped me avoid antibiotics and over the counter pain meds for the little aches and sickies. Don't get me wrong, when I hit a deep depression I jumped on Zoloft and found immense relief, on the lowest dosage no doubt. Granted, after finding NeoLife supplements and fixing elements of my diet I haven't needed a SSRI again. Beautiful. Regardless of my inklings, I do believe modern medicine has it's place. I just don't believe it should be the end all be all of "healthcare". I believe in a more holistic approach to health and wellness. Keep reading to see how this helped prepare me for today.

Almost four years ago my knee was giving me so much trouble. An old high school injury had gone undiagnosed too long. My knee was always swollen, I couldn't sit criss cross, I was starting to lose mobility and functionality. Not a good place to be when you have two small children. A long-time friend of mine had recently jumped into a nutrition journey all her own. This journey landed her in NeoLife with Louis Smith as a guide. What a guide!! Why is Louis important to MY journey? Well, #1 he's an incredible man of God... #2 he knows a thing or two about nutrition... #3 he had leukemia! Hello! I'd heard his story dozens of times. Each time just as mesmerizing as the first. Knowing he had been diagnosed in his 20s, went through modern medicine's treatment for leukemia, having doctors tell him to get his affairs in order because there was nothing more they could do. Keep in mind, he has a new wife and an even newer baby. He got mad. He got educated... learning about cancer, its causes, what feeds it, etc. He also started learning about nutrition and what impact it had on health... and cancer. Long story shorter, he changed his lifestyle (food, cleaning products, toiletries, etc) and 20+ years later he is still cancer free and bounces around the world sharing the power of nutrition with more gusto than a 5 year old with an Evel Knievel complex.

Shortly after joining NeoLife and getting to know Louis a 14 year old girl we homeschool with was diagnosed with Pre B Cell ALL (Dempsey's leukemia). I remember feeling sad for this family, scared for this girl, and yet hopeful that I could offer some help because of Louis and his experience/ knowledge. I invited the girl's mom, Jessica, via her friend, Melissa, to my house to hear Louis speak about nutrition and his story. Both ladies joined NeoLife that night and I helped get Jessica's family juicing to help her daughter. Why do I think this belongs in my post about God's provision? Because Jessica is now helping me walk the leukemia journey. She has been a strong shoulder for me to lean on and a knowing ear to listen. It's a different kind of comfort when you know the other person on the phone understands the myriad of numbers you're spewing and the new jargon you're learning. She is also the wise sage who warns me that it's gonna get worse before it gets better. God knew I would need her in this way so he made sure to cross our paths years ahead of time. Even though Jessica and I were not close friends, there is still a connection that spans several years. Plus, when you're in the Body of Christ together, quantity doesn't equal quality. You have a bond that is clear whether you tap into it often or not. It's a beautiful thing. By the way, her daughter is 17 now, beautiful, vibrant, healthy, and thriving. Jessica's daughter is a picture of hope that I cling to every day... every time I feel like this journey is swallowing me whole.

Another homeschooling treasure is Vanessa. From the moment I met her I felt an instant connection. Maybe it's the way she is heart and soul sold out for the Lord and speaks in such a way. Maybe it's the way she lavishes her gift of hospitality on people that makes me wish that was my gifting (it's totally not). More than those, though, I think it is the way she is transparent, real, open, broken and knows it. She and I have had wonderful discussion covering many topics. I simply don't connect in this way with people very often. Another of God's provisions. You see, her son walked a rough cancer journey at the very hospital we're at with some of the doctors we're with now. Vanessa is another mama who gets it. She even remembers the drugs her oldest baby (he's 18 now) took all those years ago. Her journey was long and terrifying. Her son was a medical anomaly. Praise God he is alive today and headed off to college. But that doesn't undo the very dark and scary path they walked when he was a child. Her journey has made her an important confidant for me in this journey. Priceless. Selfless love and support. Why did God connect me and Vanessa all those years ago? Simple, He knew I would need her and that I needed to trust her. She and I have had years to build a trust and a connection. Again, it's not about the amount of time you spend with a person... it's the type of time you spend with a person. Also, she is a part of NeoLife too. I worked with her aunt and mother awhile back on nutrition and supplementation.

So far these are all connected via nutrition. Three of the four points above have a cancer/ leukemia connection. There's more...

For several years, as I would hold my boys' hands and pray at bedtime, I would pray these words "...Please give this family a united Kingdom purpose. Draw us together and help us to be salt and light to this world..." Um, is there anything more uniting than a family member fighting for their life? Have you ever seen the Body of Christ mobilize as fast, as constant, as divine as you are witnessing right now? Lord knows I haven't. I mean, I've seen the Body move before but perhaps it's seems so grandiose this time because my family is at the center. Regardless, it is beautiful. It is AWEsome. It has God's fingerprints all over it. Maybe I should add "be careful what you pray for"... as if God lets OUR clarifiers get in the way of HIS plan.

Three years ago I was introduced to essential oils. doTERRA to be precise. Another bit of God's provision. Experiencing and learning about the powerful properties God placed within them has helped my family maintain a level of holistic living that wouldn't quite be as effective or efficient without them. Every drop powerful enough to service every single cell in your body. Scientific evidence to support them impacting cells in such ways as to help the body heal itself. These little gems are gonna find themselves getting a workout as we make some BIG change to our lifestyle soon.

Last year I started meeting a dear, dear friend every other Tuesday at a local cafe. What a gift. She has been Paul to my Timothy... a spiritual guide, if you will. Together we process all sorts of topics, some biblical, some not. She is a beautiful woman whom I love and value deeply. That being said, amid one of our chats (April 29th, I believe), I commented how I felt that being raised in a Christian home, always going to church, always being around Christians, never struggling, never suffering, never overcoming BIG life obstacles... I felt it made me not appreciate the redemption Christ offers and encapsulates. I knew God existed. I believed Christ was my savior. I just never really needed him. I told my friend, Ellen, this and she said that although my eternity was secure (acceptance of Christ) I hadn't really experienced sanctification (where you realize redemption is necessary). This was a powerful idea to me. I hadn't really seen my spiritual life in that light before. I think I even mentioned, "I want that." Meaning I wanted to KNOW that I was redeemed... I wanted to KNOW that God was the only answer. Then BAM! Five days later we begin this current journey. See, be careful what you pray for. Suffice it to say I now know that God is the only answer. There is no way we would be standing as we are now if he wasn't the orchestrator of this life. It's a beautiful thing because there is peace when there should be none. There is hope when there should be none. There is faith when there should be none. There is favor where there should be none. There is provision when there should be none. There is support when there should be none. There is strength (sometimes fleeting) when there should be none. Friends, the only time you get something when there is nothing... is when God is involved!

Last year was also the year I started my certification to become a Holistic Nutritionist. Would y'all believe that I received my certification one month, almost to the day, before this journey started? God was preparing my mind and our life for this journey. Because of my education, I have a foot to stand on when it comes to helping Dempsey beat the odds and lessen the side effects of this treatment. Yes, shock and fear overpowered me in April but no longer. We will be making BIG changes for this journey. Stay tuned... that's another post altogether.

Lets talk about God's provision in regards to our nurses. Beautiful creatures, female and male, each answering a calling placed on their hearts. One evening at shift change, a tall brunette female walks in wearing a mask (Dempsey was in isolation so everyone wore masks). I could see her hair, her eyes, and hear her voice. When she started going through the shift change rigmarole something in my switched on. My ears perked up and I tuned out what she was saying. When she was finished she asked "Is there anything you need?" I asked for her name. She gave it. I asked if she was married. She said she was. I asked for her maiden name. She gave it. I said something like "You went to Rancho Starbuck, didn't you?" People! I hadn't seen this woman in TWENTY-ONE years! We went to junior high together. I mean, we weren't even Facebook friends... like ever. That's how not connected we were post Jr High. We weren't even close while in Jr High. When I gave her my maiden name lights went off for her too. Spooky, right?! Well, she was on our staff a few times while we were inpatient and it was special to connect and catch up each time. Why her? I don't know. I do know there was peace when she was there. It's amazing how having history, long ago history, with someone from your youth/ childhood can provide such peace.
Another nursing angel is Katie. She's a friend's cousin. Sweet Christian woman who prayed for us each time she was part of our staff and even when she wasn't. She'd peek in just to make sure we were doing all right when we weren't in her charge. So much comfort when you know there is a staff member who is willing to pray with and for you.

Season Johnson. Learned of her by accident? I think not. What seemed like a casual name drop turns out to be a guiding light in a very dark tunnel. I am hoping to connect with her, personally, but until then I am going to stalk her blog(s) and mimic everything she has done and is doing for her son, Kicker. What she is doing speaks directly to the Holistic Nutritionist and essential oil enthusiast in me. God is working to fill me up again. Pray that I will be strong and remain determined through this part of the journey. Dempsey needs me to.

So, in closing, I would like to say... God is faithful. He is here. He is there. This post is about looking back to see his presence and provision. My goal is this: use the rear view mirror to see His faithfulness so that I will know that I can trust Him to be faithful out in front with what's to come.

Prayer requests:
Pray for miraculous healing
Pray for PERFECT numbers/ results
Pray for NO SIDE EFFECTS
Pray for no pain
Pray for no fevers
Pray for me to be diligent, strong, and firm with the new lifestyle we MUST live
Pray for Divine connections as we need them
Pray for Jake- he needs rest and health
Pray for Dempsey- this is hard and scary and losing control is never easy
Pray for Sawyer- life is a bit complicated right now no matter how "normal" we try to keep it
Pray for easy/ smooth procedures
Pray God's blessing over us
Pray for our support structure- we need it to remain strong for years
Pray that I will not fail Dempsey
Pray for those who have not come to grips with this reality
Pray for medical billing to be worked out accurately and quickly
Pray for wisdom- doctors, us, anyone we are in contact with
Pray for faith
Pray for strength- we may look strong... but our bodies betray us in many ways
Pray against worry- it's hard to not think on the future what ifs
Pray as you feel led

T-shirt Pre Order Form | CLOSED

UPDATE
The t-shirt pre-order time has closed.

A HUGE thank you to all who ordered!!


Thursday, May 12, 2016

Not PERFECT Results

I don't know why the Lord has left this prayer unanswered. Time will tell.

As Jake laid out in the previous post (here), today's CHOC visit did not hold within it the information we have been praying for. In fact, it had a step in the wrong direction wrapped up in it.

How am I feeling? I'm on the verge of falling apart. I'm angry. I'm hopeful. I'm pissed. I'm sad. I'm lost. I'm stretching my hand out as far as I can to touch Jesus' cloak but it feels just out of reach.

I'm convinced that if I just try harder, reach farther, believe deeper, pray more, learn new things, ask more questions... if I sleep long enough... things will be "normal". That's how it works, right? No? Well, shit.

As I sit here typing, Dempsey's new treatment plan lay open in front of me. So many numbers and letter. So many meds. So many procedures. So much I don't understand.

Why? Why, Lord?

Dr. Huynh, she's Dempsey's primary oncologist, while informing us of the results and impending plan, said "I'm not upset. I'm not scared. I've seen this before." Okay, so you've seen this before. How am I supposed to respond to that? In the pediatric cancer world my kid is "normal". I scoff. Granted, if you've seen this before and those kids are still alive... I guess I should hold onto whatever hope that factoid provides. Done.

Just when I was contemplating working again. I simply cannot with Dempsey's new plan. Next week alone holds FOUR chemo infusion days in row, another lumbar puncture, blood infusion, and platelet infusion. That's it... assuming nothing pops up or gets complicated.

The tears just welled up so fast my eyes are leaking. No dam strong enough for a mother whose baby is an oncology patient... leukemia fighter. I am overwhelmed. I'm glad God's got this because I sure don't.

Amid the meeting about Dempsey, the word "transplant" was floated. Doc mentions it as a far-out possibility and then tells us to not dwell on that. Um, gee, okay.... *constantly fighting back thoughts of what happens if a transplant fails* Thankfully we don't have to face that tomorrow. Praise God. She will still move in that direction toward the end of this phase just in case. I get it. It's best to be prepared for the worst while we hope and pray for the best. That way, should he need one, he will be on the books already. Much easier to just take him off the books than get him on.

I am scared of the side effects of these drugs. I can't even call them medicine. That seems so nice and fluffy. These are scary, scary DRUGS!! The one he'll get on Monday requires SIX HOURS of fluid flushing. Yes, folks... they want it in him and then right out. So, when we get home from that Dempsey will be chugging NeoLife Aloe Vera Plus!! If you want to bless us, BUY THAT! Fill out the Got Questions? form and let me know, then I can tell you how. Also, we're gonna need LOTS of essential oils! If you want to bless us this way, fill out the Got Questions? form and say so. I will contact you. :-) For all my friends who are already doTERRA Wellness Advocates, if you want to bless us with oils here are the ones we'll need: Frankincense, OnGuard, Myrrh, Sandalwood, Lemon, Breathe, Peppermint, Deep Blue, DigestZen, Lavender, Oregano.

God provides. He provided renewal and hope for me a few days ago... I'm choosing to believe it is HIS provision for this next phase. Read on...

Hope springs anew...
I have found a sage! Season Johnson. I'm going to stalk her. Read about her son, Kicker, and how they are fighting the bully named Cancer. Stay tuned for a post about my plan to help Dempsey be the healthiest cancer-fighter CHOC has ever seen. *spoiler alert: it's gonna look almost exactly like Season's* PRAY HARD FOLKS!!

Jake's Report on 5/12 visit

Here's Jake's report on today's visit at CHOC.

Leukemia Update:

The Bone Marrow Biopsy done on Monday showed that after his first month of cancer treatment (Induction), the measurement of residual cancer cells decreased from 3% to 2.1% (since day 8 of treatment). We would be much happier with a lower number, but it is good to know that there was a decrease so there is definitely progress. His body is responding to the Chemotherapy treatments, just not to the degree that is needed to enter certain treatment phases down the road without risk of relapse. Fortunately, Dempsey's genetic profile is favorable to the treatment he's receiving. These two factors place Dempsey in the "High Risk" treatment plan (not the "Average Risk" we were hoping for, but better than the "Very High Risk"). The doctor instilled in us that there is still a lot of hope for full/complete recovery/cure. Sometimes kids are just "late bloomers" for reaching the lower number, and affectively being in remission.

The next phase of treatment (Consolidation, lasting 2 months) should begin this coming Monday, as long as his blood levels are good. Consolidation treatment is more intense than the previous phase, with many daily visits to the Infusion center and we're likely to see hair loss and other side effects to the chemo.This first round will be a full day at the Out Patient Infusion (OPI) center, including a Lumbar Puncture (Spinal tap) and many hours of hydration to go with the Chemo. There will be a Bone Marrow biopsy at the end of Consolidation, at which point we hope and pray his MRD (Minimal Residual Disease) number is less than 0.01%, at which point Dempsey would move on to the next phase of treatment (Interim Maintenance, which will include some hospital stays). 

Ear/Mastoid Infection:

Some more encouraging news was that the preliminary report from Dempsey's MRI on Tuesday showed continued decrease in the mastoiditis (infection behind ears) with no swelling seen. This is great to know that this serious infection that started us on this journey is continuing it's journey out the door. This report should be fleshed out for us a little more next week with an Infection Disease appointment, and an Ear/Nose/Throat appointment later this month.

Coral and I are still processing this news, the roller coaster of ups and downs, knowing that things are improving but not the "perfect" that we pray for. Dempsey's hanging in there. He's off of steroids for the time being so we're expecting the chimpmunk cheeks and preggers-belly to start fading away.

Since I don't post much here I'll add my words of "thanks" to Coral's and say that we are so blessed to have so much love thrown our way. Thank you all!


Stay tuned for Coral's take….

Blood Draw and Meeting w/ Doctors

Please pray over Dempsey's blood draw- pain free, perfect results.

Pray over the meeting.

Thank you.

Catch Up Photos

Sittin', chattin' with pops.

Not so ready to wake up, I guess.



My Mother's Day cards from the boys.






Jeeping.


Mechanic Dempsey to the rescue. (Sawyer messed with the Jeep... typical big brother.)

Dempsey's makeshift urinal we keep by his bed so he doesn't have to walk during the night. It works wonderfully. Thanks 2 liter bottle and travel potty attachment we found on Amazon.

Before bone marrow biopsy and lumbar puncture on Monday.
Overwhelmed.


Making his MRI mask smell good with Mango Twist LipSmackers.

The wheelchair ride to the van post-MRI and anesthesia.

Tuesday's discovery!! What a wonderfully overwhelming reality.

Our dove babies aren't such babies anymore. This was the first time we saw Daddy Dove. Precious dove family of four... just like our family of four.

Celebrating Sawyer with Granny and Granddad.

Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Pray for this Nugget

Please pray for this nugget. He complained of a headache today- first time ever. He said it felt better when he drank water. We are chalking it up to poor posture while playing video games and a bit of dehydration. He had no other symptoms to make us carry our worry farther BUT I would be lying if I said I was okay. I'm not. Every sound he makes, every sound I THINK he makes, that doesn't sound "normal"... every look he gives, or look I THINK he gives sends adrenaline surging through me. That takes time to come down from. Please pray that this slight headache is was we think it is. Remember, he is also coming off a month of steroids that were stopped cold turkey (doctor's orders... it's the "plan"). Pray that we can help his body right itself with nutrition and holistic methods while we work to have the chemo treatment remove the cancer. Pray that his body continues to FIGHT. Pray for protection over WHO he is and his precious emotions. Pray that we will be ever wise and discerning, seeking the Lord's will and right path for this journey.
Bless you.

Happy 9th Birthday Sawyer

This incredible life form is 9 today!! What an amazing journey it is being his mama. He has been my rock since he was born. His mere existence makes my life exponentially better and worth living. He is such a wonderful human. He has been annointed since conception and started making the world a better place the moment he was born. He challenges me in many ways... one of which is growing my grace-giving skills. His person disarms even the crankiest of creatures and makes them instant friends. He desperately wants to do what is right and is super hard on himself when he "messes up". He blesses me with his unconditional love and randomly-timed compliments. HE CHOSE to attend church WITH ME this Sunday all on his own. It was magical. He loves better than I ever could. He inspires me!

I LOVE YOU, SAWYER!! Happy Birthday, son. 🎊🎁🎉

Sawyer's Amazon Wish List

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

Help Wanted: Chick fil-A Fundraiser June 7th

UPDATE as of May 10th:

As of this evening, my volunteer spots are FULL!

What an answer to prayer you are. Thank you. THANK YOU!!

I hope to see all my local peeps at Chick-fil-A at The La Habra Marketplace on June 7th between 5pm and 8pm.

Great food. Great cause. Great company.

wink emoti

MRI Update

Thank you for your prayers. Some of them have been answered.

The procedure went well. The anesthesia seems to have had no lasting effect on him. It was hard for him to wake up with an IV in his hand but we were able to get that removed quickly. The IV was only there to administer the anesthesia because they don't like to access his port more than they have to... each time there is a risk of infection.

He has kept down water, a NeoLife chocolate peanut butter bar, and now a NeoLife 1/2 vanilla & 1/2 chocolate protein shake. I love that his nutrients are from whole foods and doing his body a whole lotta good. I also added some NeoLife Acidophilus Plus, highest quality probiotic, to his shake as well to help build up his good gut flora. The insane amount of antibiotics he's been on have, no doubt, wreaked havoc on his intestines. So, I will fix that with nutrition. *thumbs up*

We will hopefully find out the results of the MRI on Thursday but might be as late as next week.

Thank you for your prayers!!!!! We needed them. He needs them.

We are grateful for you. Each and every one of you. Please keep those prayers coming. They are sustaining us.

Building Immunity with Whole-food Nutrition

Another opportunity to support Dempsey through this journey...

As we trudge through this cancer journey we have a renewed vigor to build Dempsey's immunity (and ours as well) with organic, whole-food nutrition. We are members of Farm Fresh to You, a local CSA. If you are the type of generous giver who loves practical blessings, this is it. You can purchase the eGift cards by following the link.

If you choose to bless us in this way, please know we are grateful. We thank you and appreciate your generosity. I know it is hard for those who aren't local to "do" something. Rest assured, PRAYER IS MOST IMPORTANT and you can do that anywhere at any time. <3 :-)

Prayer Requests

Please pray for PERFECT RESULTS from the bone marrow biopsy today and for EVERY test that is done for Dempsey. We need PERFECT RESULTS.

Pray for miraculous healing. If it's not spontaneous or instantaneous then pray for miraculous, doctor-baffling, God-designed moments of healing. Pray that Dempsey will be the first cancer patient to never have a fever or complication. Pray that he will defy odds and expectations.

Pray for Dempsey to not feel hunger tomorrow since he is NPO (cannot eat) now until his MRI tomorrow at 1:30pm. It's tempting to wake him at 5:00am to get him to eat something but then he'd be awake at 5:00am... stupid tight rope we have to walk.

Pray that his mastoiditis is GONE!! Never to return. This will indicate healing and lessen the drugs he has to take which will only help his body.

Pray that he will eat whatever we give him so that we can fight the cancer from the inside out with nutrition and an environment as clean as we can get it.

Monday, May 9, 2016

What About Brother?

Our first born turns >>9<< on Wednesday! T minus 2 days...

It is such an honor to be Sawyer's parent. He is just about the sweetest, most disarming child I've ever known. He is a myriad of wonderful characteristics. I won't start listing them because I will forget some and they will be important ones. :-)

This journey that Dempsey is on, that we are all on, is making it harder to celebrate our amazing Sawyer. With Dempsey being so immune-compromised we cannot have people over. We cannot go anywhere as a family (to play or eat). There can be no bouncer because we just can't bear to tease Dempsey like that. It would be special to do a family movie night... except that is every night right now.

I know that there are some who feel we should just celebrate Sawyer regardless of whether or not Dempsey could partake in the celebration but we are not those people. We do things as a family. As it is we were considering a Legoland trip with just Sawyer and Jake because Dempsey can't go and if we wait much longer it won't be worth it for Sawyer (or as enjoyable the older he gets).

We had been trying to make that work for this Thursday but we found out this morning we now have a meeting at CHOC regarding Dempsey's results from this morning's biopsy and the plan for the Consolidation part of treatment. So, Legoland is out for this week. Jake is considering returning to work so that going to severely limit the time and possibility for a Legoland trip. This is frustrating. I want so bad to celebrate Sawyer in that way and the reality of Dempsey's condition is making it really hard. So many appointments. So many schedules to reference. So much importance placed on Dempsey and what he needs right now... and rightly so. It just breaks my heart. One, that we're having to live this nightmare and two, that Sawyer's life is impacted in so many ways as well.

I want to go back to NORMAL!!

Sawyer is an incredible brother. He knows Dempsey's condition is serious. He's also a child big brother. He's a putz. He pushes Dempsey's buttons just because. He is, in this way, a typical older brother. That's all well and good except that Dempsey's cancer has pretty much wiped out just about all of the too-small fuse I already had. How do you make a nine year old understand that you still love and adore him but that he isn't the main focus right now? This is hard. He is a wonderful kid and he should be celebrated. Why am I so afraid that him having a few super low-key birthdays is going to ruin his life? I know it won't. I know that he'll probably end up better for it because he gets to learn that there are times other people are just more important. This is giving us plenty of teachable moments. Moments to talk about selflessness, consideration, denying self, contentment, joy, and a bunch of other topics that will shape our boy into an even better MAN.

It's just hard to feel like you're failing one son as you fight for the other's life.

A few of you have blessed Sawyer already by choosing something off his Amazon list. THANK YOU FOR THAT!! Those lists have been life savers and blessings.

The plan: a family dinner at the only other safe place that's not CHOC- Granny and Granddad's house. We will play board games and wii games. We will eat an early dinner and open presents. We are praying that we can make a simple celebration show our deep love to our Sawyer.


Prayer requests:
Pray that we will be gracious
Pray that Sawyer will gain wisdom and understanding
Pray that his heart will be protected
Pray that Dempsey will not come out of this a spoiled brat (something we are working hard to avoid)
Pray that we will find the right balance of celebration and acknowledgement
Pray as you feel led

Fundraisers

Mark your calendars, friends.
A few practical ways you can support Dempsey.

Origami Owl with Holly Peery

Below is a photo of my "Dempsey's Journey" Origami Owl bracelet. I love it!
I love all my Origami Owl pieces.
Brown leather band, medium silver locket with Swarovski crystals, orange awareness ribbon, #4,
boy charm, Inscriptions plate that says "Dempsey 4.3.16 Leukemia",
*crystal cross, August heart not pictured.



Food with a Purpose

Go Fund Me: "Dempsey's Journey"


If you have an idea for a fundraiser, please fill out the form in the Got Questions? post and share your idea. We love out of the box ideas!!

Sunday, May 8, 2016

Big Day Tomorrow: Please Pray

Bone marrow biopsy
Please pray for a smooth, pain-free procedure.
Pray for PERFECT results to the tests.
Pray for courage.
Pray for an easy transition out of anesthesia.
Pray for no complications.
Pray for no side effects.
Pray the cancer is GONE.
Pray for the medical staff.

Lumbar puncture
Pray all of the above for this as well.


For those of you reading this tonight, please pray that the Lord will smooth out the path before us. That we will have travel mercies to and from CHOC. That Dempsey will not be hungry in the morning because he cannot have food after midnight tonight. We are grateful for an early morning procedure time. We are eager to know the results of this biopsy. We are expectantly praying for miraculous healing and any miracle God chooses to bless us with. Pray with us in that way.

Thank you for your prayer support. I know I say this a lot but it's true... your prayers are sustaining us.

God is answering prayers! Just look at the previous post!! God is so good!!!

Grab Some Tissues!

Best. Mother's Day. Gift. Ever.

Tears of joy when I got home after church and picking up lunch with Sawyer.

Sawyer wanted to sot with me at church today... "...only of John is preaching." So sweet to have my big boy next to me in church and it be HIS IDEA.

Then, to come home to Dempsey walking unassisted... JOY!

Thank you, God, for working in my Dempsey.

Happy Mother's Day

As I start receiving loving messages of "Happy Mother's Day" this morning, I pause to survey my emotions.

Joy.
Love.
Gratitude.
Thankfulness.
Sadness.
Grief.

I'm sure there's more, too.

Joy because I have the most amazing husband who helped make me a mama- twice. The most perfect helpmate and life partner this woman could have. Two incredible sons that are already changing the world for the better. One who has been sent to me, in part, to be my rock and reason for for staying "present" in life. The other has been sent, in part, to bring me life-changing, heart wall demolishing, faith-building growth and more. I pray that I leave a legacy of love with and for these three gifts from God- my husband and two sons.

Love. Man! I have never been the center of so much love if you add my whole life together as I am right now. Love from family. Love from friends recent and long ago. Love from strangers to me. Love with prayer. Love with food. Love with gifts. Love with words. Love with presence. Love. Love is not only an amorous feeling. Love is not always easy. Love is a choice. It's choosing to care for someone when it's easy AND when it's hard. And boy, I'm I loved.

For all that love, I am grateful. God has opened my eyes and my heart in new ways. Ways that make it impossible to return to who I was. Too much width and depth between me then and me now. I am grateful. Gratfeul for God's faithfulness in joyful times and in times of despair. Grateful that He placed an incredible support structure around me to carry me through such a surreal journey. Grateful for everything I have and even what I don't have- because I have just what I need.

For me, being thankful is being able to find the good in bad situations and be glad about it. When I harness this I find strength in even dark seasons. I wasn't always a thankful person. It took time and practice for me to cultivate this in a genuine manner. Thankfulness is more than a fleeting "Thank you" out of obligation because, of course, manners. It comes from a place deep inside that realizes my life is not by accident and that my God-given job is not to be happy but obedient. When my focus is on the Lord, knowing HE knows what I need... thankfulness abounds.

Sadness because life is hard right now. Sadness because some relationships aren't as I expected. Sadness because there is pain and struggle. Sadness because I don't know where "normal" went. Sadness because my heart is aching. I think where there is true joy there will also be sadness.

Why grief? Because of loved ones gone, never to return. Because when things change in a shocking way I have to process through some tough stuff and those stages have been labeled "grief". Because there are circumstances currently at play that are so far beyond my realm of control. Because I survey the lives of dear friends and loved ones and see such profound pain. Grief happens. It's okay. I lean into it, work to feel it, and know I will emerge triumphant one day.

Be blessed today and everday my friends! YOU are worth celebrating EVERY DAY. People are worth celebrating every day.