Biggest Need

MONEY

It's not glamorous. It's not pretty. It's not fun. It's not creative. It's not ingenious. It's not smart. It's not comical.

It is endearing. It is powerful. It is helpful. It is necessary. It is provision. It is humbling. It is impactful. It is peace-providing.

You have two ways you can give: YouCaring & PayPal

Friday, June 10, 2016

In Defiance of Leukemia... We BEACH!

 Dempsey gettin' ready for the beach.

We're driving.... 

...we're driving. Daddy is so silly. You people think he's so reserved... ha! 

Unpacking the bikes and trike. 

We ride south. Dempsey in the lead (by design).

Stop for a snack and to rest little legs. 

We made it! Huntington State Beach, flood canal.



Hello, Ocean... we meet again. 

 Silliness abounds and my heart fills with joy.
Sun-protected soul mates. 


Silly Sawyer. Typical. 

Brothers in the water. My cup runneth over. 

More snacking to keep blood sugar levels acceptable. 

And back we go. 

Pedaling ALL the time on his trike is tiring! Sweet baby with his folded hands. Melts me. 

My gorgeous boy. Dempsey's journey is hard on him too. We can't forget that.


A day at the beach was just what this family needed after yesterday. The weather was perfect. The water temp was perfect. Granted, we didn't go swimming in it. It was the best day at the beach I have ever had. To see Dempsey run, jump, and traipse through the tiny waves was something dreams are made of. Well, at least my dreams these days. Today was PERFECT. It didn't matter that there were arguments, sleepy outbursts, tired legs, frustration, and whining. Nope, didn't matter. Why? Because there was also laughter, sunshine, salt water, waves, bike/ trike riding, smiles, taunting the limits of the waves, joy, exuberance, fun, family time, memories, and realizing that leukemia doesn't always limit life. Our cancer patient CAN (and should) be as normal as possible. Yes, we must watch his counts and be careful but he doesn't need to be in a bubble.

We don't know what the rest of this journey holds. We don't know what tomorrow brings. We do know he had a sh**ty day yesterday (sometimes curse words serve a purpose). We do know that he felt great today. What do you do when you are feeling great after surviving a nightmare? You LIVE!! You go. You do. You breathe in the air God has blessed you with and use the body God gave you. You stare cancer in the face and flip it the bird, with all due respect. You make memories. You scream "carpe diem" from the rooftops like those Newsies did. Well, they screamed "seize the day" but you get my drift.

**loooooonnnngggg pause for family time**

And then you try to put yourself back together after your baby starts crying and saying "My head hurts like it did at the hospital." Talk about freaking out. He ended up throwing up his dinner. Praise God that the vomit seemed to make his body feel better. He is tired and a bit weak but giggling and ready for bed.


Prayer requests:
Please for miraculous healing (I feel too weak for this long journey)
Pray against side effects
Pray against nausea
Pray against fevers
Pray against fear
Pray protection over Dempsey's body, mind, soul
Pray protection over this family
Pray protection over our marriage
Pray, dang it.... PRAY!!!
Pray to get us through this
Pray that Dempsey would be spared any more horrible moments
Pray that we will be ever more diligent about alternative healing methods and regimens
Pray for TRUTH
Pray for mercy
Pray protection over Sawyer's big brother heart and his mind (he is often under attack from the enemy's forces)
Pray as you feel led

Thursday, June 9, 2016

In The Moment

Originally I was planning to title this post something to the tune of TERRIFYING or  The Day That Was Good Then REALLY Bad Then Good Again...

As I cleaned the Vitamix after fixing Dempsey's nutrition-packed smoothie, the current title hit me. I had this epiphany about moment-to-moment living. So, here it goes...

Today started earlier than most for me. Alarm sounding at 6:45am but only after natures alarm, in the shape of a bird, sounded repeatedly starting at 5:45am. Lovely. I rose with the knowledge that the morning meant Dempsey couldn't eat (he was NPO for his lumber puncture procedure), he had a procedure, and he had infusions of two separate drugs. We left for CHOC's OPI at 7:45 and arrived early and in one piece. Praise God. We checked in and after his standard measurements we were escorted to his procedure room.


The anesthesia and procedure went off without a hitch. This is the usual reality for Dempsey. Praise God. The vincristine infusion was up next and went smoothly. Praise God. Then it was time for the PEG infusion. Aaaannnnndddd this is where the day went off the rails.

NeoLife protein shake.

Just a few minutes later the day would darken...

Dempsey's face turned a shade of raspberry that is not normal. He started scratching and grabbing at his neck. When I asked if he was okay he said he was but I could tell he wasn't. I started getting concerned. I pressed him again about what he was feeling and he told me "It's burning and hurting really bad!" Then his tears came. I kept telling him "Breathe in.... and out.... breathe in.... and out." He did, through tears and fear. As I watched his face, the area underneath his eyes looked as though it was starting to blister from the inside out. The nurse, Hazel, was ON IT and was already in the process of drawing out what was already in his line and then administering Benadryl and hydrocortisone through his IV. It didn't take long at all for those antihistamines to kick in. Praise God. But I was done for. The adrenaline had been released and there was no one to suck that back out of me and give me anything to bring me down. Dempsey's internal pain subsided. He began to relax and show interest in his iphone games again. His eyelids started getting heavy, thanks to the Benadryl. As he gave in to the drowsiness, I surveyed the first really negative side effects that he has experienced since starting this journey. Just to impress upon you the significance of this particular situation, this is what happened: burning sensation, flushed face, hives, blisters (2 under the adhesive from his access covering), swelling of his ear (huge), swelling of his upper cheeks, swelling of his upper lip. It took hours for all the swelling to subside. I cried as I watched him in his Benadryl-induced rest.


Please tell me you can see how he doesn't look like himself.

When he woke from his antihistamine slumber, he had to go #2. I made sure he could stand and that he wasn't drowsy. He then led the way to the restroom to handle his #2 business. It was wonderful to watch him do this whole thing with zero trouble. Praise God. (Even as I write this, my body recalls the adrenaline sensations...) On our way back to his room, nurse Dana met us and escorted us. She paged the uppers to get permission to de-access Dempsey so we could go home. We were released rather quickly with everyone signing off on his blood pressure, oxygen levels, heart rate, physical appearance, and overall demeanor. Y'all, I really wanted to just go home... even if it was to a false sense of security.

So, back to the title of this post. Being "in the moment" gives my emotions the chance to BE. Emotions are vital for living wholistically. Yes, I meant that with the "w". Emotions are a part of the whole me. Even the emotions that are scary and ugly... they deserve the right to exist too. God wired us with them and they serve a purpose. I try to lean into them when they pop up. I hear it's healthy to do that. (Thank you Dr Dani.) Plus, feeling those yucky emotions makes feeling their counterparts even more special. Keep reading.

We picked up substandard (don't judge) but purpose-fulfilling food on the way to my parent's house. Sawyer had been with them since Jake went to work. Praise God. After eating, Dempsey commenced playing wii with Sawyer. Their giggling and bickering was therapy for each of us. Dempsey was more his "normal" self with each passing moment. Me? I was still feeling the effects of adrenaline. The boys and I left for home a bit later and our wii got a workout. Dinner was delivered by Lascari's thanks to generous friends via Meal Train. Jake got home a short time later. Praise God.

After dinner, there was more wii, family bike/ trike riding (around our hood twice!), outside Star Wars play with brother, bath time, and currently an episode of What's in the Bible?. So many "normal" sounds!! Praise God. During the outside play and bike riding, Dempsey was RUNNING back and forth on our cul de sac. It was awesome! Praise God!!!!!!



I sure hope this video plays for you.

Revisiting the title of this post, again. See, the precious moments of family time and watching Dempsey enjoy life are sweeter having just been sent through the wringer a few hours ago. It goes to show just how quickly life can change: for better or for worse. If I chose to dwell in the past (when Dempsey was healthy) I would be depressed every minute of every day that he has leukemia. If I chose to dwell in the future (when Dempsey will be healthy again and leukemia free) I would be depressed every minute of every day that I wake up and Dempsey has leukemia. As I choose to live IN the present, I experience a myriad of emotions. High highs and low lows. Each day is a potential emotional roller coaster. Each day is Schrödinger's Cat (Google it). Each day is a gift from God. When I choose to live IN the present it is easy to find joy and beauty amid the scary.

After reading about #KatheringTheBrave, a sweet girl who lost her war with cancer this week, I have NO EXCUSE/ right to take any moment of Dempsey's life (or any life) for granted or be angry at setbacks. Why not? Coral, your child has cancer! You have the right to be angry and scared! Okay, yes, my baby has cancer. BUT his cancer has a very good prognosis. Even if this journey takes him down the "very high risk" road, he still has 80% or greater success rate. That's a global statistic. Poor Katherine the Brave never had those odds. She was in need of a miracle from the get-go. This is not Dempsey's journey. Yes, Dempsey's journey is still very scary and wrought with hand-wringing moments... but he's ALIVE! He's breathing. He's fighting. He's living. Most of the time he's even thriving. Y'all, THAT is what I need to focus on. I will not let the enemy derail me from the present. Be warned, though, the present may mean LOTS of tears, puffy eyes, curse words, short fuses, head shaking, shoulder shrugging, sideways smirks, and pleas for prayer while praying myself. It's ugly. It should be ugly because cancer is ugly. Also, pretty/ easy doesn't bring sanctification.

God is good. He is faithful. He is with us. He has a purpose for all of this. He didn't choose this for Dempsey. He allowed it to happen. He will bring us through this. I pray that I will always hold on to these truths. I pray that I can lean into HIM who created everything... who holds it all together. I pray that I can bring him glory with each session of praise or pleading. I pray that I will always be real- even when it's ugly or uncomfortable. I pray that I will always look for the Kingdom perspective. I pray that I will leave a Kingdom legacy that outlives my grandchildren's grandchildren. Maybe I should add some clarifiers to that last one... whatchya think?


Prayer requests:
Pray for miraculous healing
Pray for strength (of all kinds)
Pray for courage
Pray for faith
Pray for wisdom
Pray for alternative health guidance and applications
Pray for purpose to be revealed
Pray for ability to live IN the present
Pray over our marriage
Pray protection over Sawyer and Dempsey
Pray that the enemy never gains a foothold
Pray protection over our house
Pray for clarity of mind
Pray for clear markers along God's path
Pray for divine appointments
Pray for our support structure
Pray that finances fall into place all along the way
Pray for restoration, renewal, appropriate pruning
Pray that we can articulate our concerns and desires to the doctors
Pray for our medical staff, their lives, their families
Pray for other families afflicted with cancer
Pray as you feel led

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Pray Over Tomorrow

Please go before Dempsey in prayer for tomorrow. He has ANOTHER lumbar puncture. I am SO sick of these. I know they serve a purpose but it really sucks watching my baby be given drugs, fall asleep with his eyes open, wake up seeing double, and us praying that there are no complications or side effects of the whole procedure.

Not only does Dempsey have a lumbar puncture, he also has an infusion of two chemo drugs.

Please pray over ever organ in his body.
Pray over every cell in his body.
Pray for miraculous healing.
Pray that the Lord would use Dempsey's body to defy medical "wisdom" and prove God's existence.
Pray against negative side effects.
Pray against complications.
Pray for Dempsey's doctors.
Pray for their families and their lives.
Pray that we can touch those on our path that the Lord has been preparing just for us to minister to- whatever that looks like.
Pray for a smooth procedure with perfect results.
Pray for the other families at the clinic with us.
Pray as you feel led.

An Anonymous Thank You

This post is an anonymous thank you to all of you anonymous givers. *wink, wink*

THANK YOU!
Thank you for your generosity.
Thank you for using the Amazon list(s) as we intended (as a guide to help those that want to do something).
Thank you for loving on our family.
Thank you for supporting Dempsey in practical ways.
Thank you for following through on the thought to bless us.
Thank you for being so okay with receiving zero accolades or personal thanks.
Thank you for not forgetting about our Sawyer as well.
You are amazing and we are thankful.


See, since I can't thank those of you who choose to bless us in secret personally... I will take to the blog on social media with my thanks and pray that you see it so that you know we appreciate you and value you.


What A Spirit Night | Chick fil-A La Habra

What a Spirit Night! The Holy Spirit was at work at Chick fil-A La Habra last night. I would LOVE to know how many orders were had the "Spirit Night" text on them because there was no way I could keep track of all who came in support of Dempsey. It was magical.

The age of attendees ranged from the very young to the very wise. It was beautiful. Friends who couldn't make it sent their littles with the grandparents to show support. Others sent one representative to pick up food because they knew the place would be packed.

We had kids as door monitors, janitors, drink-refillers, table bussers, serving, and more. We had adults helping with ribbons, taking photos, serving, bussing, and whatever else. Each of them sporting their "I wear ORANGE for DEMPSEY" t-shirts. It was beautiful.

People who came just for dinner, with no knowledge of our event, handed money to our volunteers to give to the family. Beyond buying their meal, others gave cash. I have a feeling one gentleman emptied the current contents of his wallet. I had conversation after conversation after conversation. Hugs upon hugs. So many I love yous! I was blessed with sweet and thoughtful gifts. Towards the end of the event, a couple requested my audience. They were an absolute treat to chat with. The wife wanted to offer her quilt-making skills and make a quilt for Dempsey. How sweet is that? I don't know these people. They simply came in to Chick fil-A for dinner, like normal, and were smacked with a packed place and a Spirit Night in full force. So many divine appointment last night. So many words of heavenly validation. This extrovert was well-filled.

My family wants to give the biggest THANK YOU to all of you who came to support us last night. We also want to thank those of you who couldn't make it but were praying or supporting us in spirit. Through this journey, the Lord continues to show me just how loved we are. It is overwhelming and surprising.

I look forward to sharing a TON of photos with you. Stay tuned...

Okay, moment of transparency... I thought this post was going to be longer and vastly more eloquent. I think that means I'm my version of speechless. There are feelings... oh so many feels... but I don't have the words to explain them.

THANK YOU!

Below is the handout we had at our table last night. Feel free to share it with people.



Sunday, June 5, 2016

Pray Ahead of this Week

Prayer warriors,

I am asking you to cover this week with prayer before it even begins. We know the Lord is beyond space and time and that he is already IN the week ahead. We also know that the Lord wants to commune with us, hear our pleas, and be present WITH us, always. Knowing that, we want your prayers to cover every moment of the week(s) ahead.

Here are some specifics:

  • Monday is an easy day. This means there are NO appointments and we get to just be a family! Praise God.
  • Tuesday Dempsey just has a physical therapy follow-up. We are eager to show off how well he is doing and the huge strides he's made with his mobility and energy. This is also the day for the Chick fil-A fundraiser!!! Have you made your dinner plans accordingly? *smile*
    Please pray for a positive PT appointment and that we can get some more exercises specific to his condition/ needs to continue helping him regain his strength and agility. Please cover the fundraiser in prayer. We would LOVE for the doors propped open because there is a steady line of Dempsey supporters flooding the restaurant. We would LOVE to break all kinds of Chick fil-A records with this three hour time span they are blessing us with. We would LOVE to see YOU!!!
  • *Wednesday holds a blood draw for Dempsey. He will be accessed (needle in his chest) and we'll keep it through Thursday's appointments and then have it out.
  • *Thursday has another lumbar puncture and chemotherapy infusion.
    Please start praying over the doctors, the staff, Dempsey, Dempsey's body, the efficacy of the drugs, etc. Please pray over EVERY infusion he receives- that each of his organs would be protected, that he would have zero side effects, that he would be courageous, that he would feel nothing negative. Pray that they chemotherapy drugs go into his body, kill ALL the cancer cells, leave the healthy cells, and then leave his body leaving no negative wake behind them. Pray that Dempsey's urinary tracy is strong and not impacted in a negative way. Pray that his digestive system remains balanced with the nutrition and oils regimens we have in place.
Please pray over our marriage. We know that there are several of you who have been covering this specific area consistently, we deeply appreciate that. We have been warned that this cancer journey will test our marriage like nothing we've encountered before. We know this to be true. So, we ask for your prayers. This journey is hard on our marriage. We are grateful for the time and effort we have put into our marriage where communication and learning our spouse's love languages. We are learning how to navigate this specific journey. We think we're doing all right. Perfect? Hardly. But we are stronger together because we have abilities the other doesn't and we compliment one another (not just in the oh, my, you are a looker way either). We struggle. We succeed. We fail. We carry each other. We fall apart in our turn. We are human and we have a child with cancer. See, we need your prayers because we are determined to walk Dempsey into victory over leukemia and have a marriage made out of something that only comes from God.

Ways to help and/ or bless:
Meal Train   Amazon Lists   PayPal (takes zero% of donation)  GoFundMe (takes 8% of donation)
Take the PLEDGE- coming soon!!!


*Updated with correct information about Wednesday and Thursday.