Share Your Story

Readers,

I cannot begin to explain the importance of sharing your story! Tonight during our biking/ triking time, we ran into fellow neighborhood dwellers. We have seen this couple and their dogs often walking through our hood. Sawyer, being the extrovert he is, always says hello and we have had pleasant interactions with the neighbors because of it. Tonight was no different for me. After a brief exchange of "hello" and "how ya doin'?" I was given an opportunity to share about Dempsey's leukemia journey (our leukemia journey). The neighbors were shocked. Why? 1. Because Dempsey doesn't look like a kid with cancer and 2. they, like anyone with a heart, think it's absolute shite when a child is handed a card called Cancer. It was a wonderful exchange of stories. Some similar. Some different. Turns out the wife is a nurse. I found out their daughter is a Type 1 diabetic, has hyperthyroid issues, and a plethora of other ailments... at only 30 yrs old. They asked questions. I answered. They assured me, multiple times, that they would pray for Dempsey, and us. What a blessing that is! The husband asked if Dempsey gets any treats and if so what does he like. What a sweet question. I explained that sweets are WAY down on the list because of the effect sugar has on cancer. I also explained that "dessert", in our house, can mean dry roasted salted almonds. *smile* See, dessert doesn't have to mean sweet treats... you CAN make it mean something else. *thumbs up* As we were saying our adieus, the husband told me he was going to get Dempsey some almonds. I was politely emphatic that they be organic and he assured me they would be. I smiled and thanked him profusely.

Such moments are happening more and more in my life because I am sharing our story! No one will know how to help you or pray for you if you don't share your story. People DO want to help. Even if they can't help in tangible, get-your-hand-around-it ways, they will offer to pray. Take them up on that. If they're not pray-ers and instead are positive thought-ers... take them up on that! No matter what you are facing you can use more prayers and positive thoughts. We ALL have struggles. We are all deep-valley-experiencers. We are all hurting in some way. Sure, us Americans are poised and ready to put on our masks of jubilation, self-sufficiency, all-together-ness,  composure, perfection... in reality we are hiding despair, loneliness, brokenness, messiness, failure, and more. We are human. Our family is full of humans. Our friends are human. You know what that means? You're gonna break. You're gonna fail. You're gonna get hurt. You're gonna hurt someone. YOU'RE HUMAN. No offense, but I expect you to fail. No, not at everything or at every turn or even all the time. But at some point. Lord knows I fail... a lot. Shocking, right? Those that know me are shaking their heads going, "Nope, girl I know you fail a whole bunch." And they love me anyway. Just like you fail and I love you anyway. You know what makes me love you? Your shortcomings. Your struggles. Your failings. You know why? Because when I know you have those I can begin to relate to you. If you've got it all together and nothing ever rattles you... it's hard for me to trust you. Just sayin. I don't want perfect people in my life. I want the perfect people FOR my life. See the difference?

I should warn you, this post is gonna get LOOOOOONNNNNNNGGGGGGG...... Go grab some water now or pee or both.

Yesterday and today were full of the NEOLIFE Convention 2016 for me. Jake was with me yesterday but not today. Yesterday started out rough. After we dropped the boys off with my folks I proceeded to direct Jake to the wrong location. No one's failing but my own. I cried the whole way from the wrong location to the right one. How could I have been so stupid? How could I not have planned better and been more accurate? Now we were going to be late. I hate being late. You know what I hate more than being late? Feeling stupid. Boy did I feel stupid! That set the tone for the rest of the day. I felt so awful I couldn't hold Jake's hand because it felt like grace and I just needed to beat myself up for awhile. In reality, I'm STRESSED OUT, exhausted, fragile, reaching a breaking point, bordering on a psychotic episode, frustrated, angry, worried, fearful, tired, lonely, mentally taxed, emotionally drained, did I mention tired? Being the mom/ parent of a CK (cancer kid) is HARD. No, it's not the same upper echelons of hard as someone who is caring for a quadriplegic or a severe cerebral palsy case. It's not even the same kind of hard as caring for someone who is low-functioning autistic. But for us, it is HARD, nonetheless. No, no, no... I'm not trying to compare journeys with anyone! They are all different and we are all tasked with a different hard journey or journeys if that is the case. I'm simply stating that what is HARD for us is just that, hard for us.

Back to the Convention.

FRIDAY
I was quiet. Distant. Reserved. I talked to people but not like I normally talk to people. I didn't go seek people out. I barely made eye contact with those that saw me or sought me out. Why? Simply because I knew I was one hug away from my emotional dam bursting like the Flood was in full effect. Not wanting to look like the basket case I obviously am at a function that is all kinds of fun celebratory moments... I chose to be introverted. It was the right choice for me in the moment.

Jake was nervous about being away from Dempsey so long knowing his counts were low and bordering on the need for a platelet infusion. He's introverted to begin with so the rah-rah-ness of Convention is lost on him and with me being quiet and withdrawn I knew he wasn't comfortable. Being the amazing husband he is, he stayed and made do. I gave him permission to skip Saturday and even encouraged him to do what he felt was best- spending time with our boys since he'll be working six straight days this week. It was the right choice for him for the day.

SATURDAY
I went to Convention alone. I was better suited emotionally, mentally, physically for today and whatever it brought. I wasn't extra-extroverted but I wasn't quiet. I mingled. I chatted. I shared. I cried. I hugged. I laughed. I wrote. I loved. I listened. I learned. I was present. It was wonderful.

I needed my NEOLIFE people. My family. These are strangers who have become family over the years. Each year we add new ones to the family and it just gets better and better. Many of them have been faithfully praying for Dempsey and our family throughout this leukemia journey. I cannot tell you how priceless their prayers and support have been. Some have even blessed Dempsey with products he needs to THRIVE during treatment and beyond. Some have given valuable advice. Others money. I am overwhelmed by their love for me and my family... these dear friends who were strangers just a few years ago. Over the years I have learned their stories because they shared them! They were vulnerable in sharing their valleys and were receptive when we rejoiced with them on their peaks. It's been a most beautiful ebb and flow of emotions and support.

They didn't let me down.

They hugged me. They asked about Dempsey. They cried with me. Men cried with me! They shared their hearts with me. Precious pieces of themselves as offerings to me in my time of _______ [fear, grief, unknowing]. Talking to new moms and praying over their sweet babies protection. Being reminded that God is FOR us and he is WITH us. They prayed for me.

It wasn't all about me though. I got to inquire about THEM. Their struggles. Their successes. Their trials. Their thoughts and feelings. Their families. It was all beautiful and priceless.

So many stories!!!! So many wonderful threads being woven together in the Lord's tapestry. Amen.

Today's surprise? Jake and I earned $200 in FREE PRODUCT. Hello! That was unexpected. Apparently we have been consistent in qualifying as Senior Managers long enough that we won something for it. I love things like this! The products will help us help Dempsey! God did that. Validation.

I could go on and on... and I would if I wasn't so sleepy and wanting to spend time with Jake before drifting off to la-la land.

Suffice it to say, it is IMPERATIVE for you to share your story. You just never know who you'll help or how you'll be helped.


Precious Dempsey moments this evening:
While in his bath, he asked me, with a smile on his face, "Mommy, you want your feet washed?" I said "Why yes, I do." He proceeded to wash my feet.
Fantasia 2000: Pines of Rome- "This is most beautiful song I ever heard." -Dempsey
"Indeed I do" was uttered a few times. Don't even know where he picked that up.

Pray for Dempsey: he has infusion on Monday and a bone marrow biopsy on July 25th.