A Little Break

Starting today, Dempsey has NO MEDICINE for 7 days! Praise God.

He will have another infusion on Tuesday, December 6th.

Then, I believe, we start the phase called Maintenance the following week. Maintenance is the longest phase. The "easiest" phase. This is the phase where we are supposed to reclaim some "normal". I don't know how fast or hard I will run into that notion. I still want to protect Dempsey as much as possible BUT it would be nice to be able to not be terrified every time we take him into public. I still won't feel comfortable at public parks or in high-use bathrooms. However, maybe Target won't be so scary and maybe a movie theater could potentially, possibly be an option. We look forward to being able to mingle with our large families and see friends again without them having to take showers, or change before our encounter. Even the notion of a vacation seems possible, assuming we stay local and don't go in public swimming pools.

Honestly, I have no clue how this phase will change our current living rhythms.

I know that we will be on a LONG roller coaster of emotions in Maintenance as we work in tandem to poison our son every night for over 1,000 nights. Please don't try to make me see this as "helping" Dempsey. I do not believe I am helping Dempsey. Don't encourage me to lean into the "wisdom" of the doctors or the "proven standard of care". Doctors are always PRACTICING medicine... they are not medical perfectors and they certainly do not possess a well-rounded education or view of health. I do not pretend that doctors are somehow above the rest of us... they aren't. They happened to study something different than I did and when they tell me, in not so blunt terms, that my education in health (nutrition) isn't valid or they dismiss my questions... I lose respect for them and their profession. It also causes me to question their motives and their ego.

Are there good doctors out there? Absolutely! Are there doctors out there who take a holistic approach to health? Absolutely! Are any of those kind of doctors on my son's team? Absolutely not! His team consists of people who only look at him as cancer. My son is SO MUCH MORE THAN CANCER!!!!

So, for now, we rest in the space of no medicine. We soak it up. We celebrate it. We detox the last dose of chemo out of him, strengthen him for the next round, and work to keep him strong- just like every other day in this fight. We give him words for his emotions and then the space to feel and express those emotions. We all take deeper-than-normal breaths when the chemotions come into play... and they do, every.... single.... day. We work with Sawyer to process through what happens between him and Dempsey and how he feels about it. Jake and I die to ourselves, in honor of each other, when we force ourselves to talk about things that are bothering us about the other. If you thought communication was hard in a normal circumstance, let me assure that it is exponentially harder in a child-with-cancer scenario.

We are thankful for you, grateful to you, and prayerful over you.

How can you pray?

• Pray against negative side effects for Dempsey
• Pray protection over his little body- lumbar punctures, port accesses, chemo infusions, anesthesia, sedation, bone marrow biopsies, organ health, cell health, immune strength
• Pray the rest of us remain in excellent health so we don't put Dempsey in jeopardy and can continue to care for him to the best of our ability
• Pray for our support network- this is LONG and hard journey and we will need them beyond the treatment years
• Pray for our finances- we need to do some remodeling and structural fixes and have NO CLUE how we are going to pay for it
• Pray for our personal grace stores- daily they are filled by the Lord only to be emptied by this journey's trials
• Pray for each of our hearts- brother takes it hard being Dempsey's 24/7 companion; Mom takes it hard being Dempsey's main everything; Dad takes it hard knowing that mom is Dempsey's main everything while he provides for all of us through his job away from home; Dempsey's heart takes it hard because his body is being taxed like you would not believe and that means sometimes his brain and mouth don't connect and that is frustrating.
• Pray for people to be creative in their fundraising- example: a friend auctioned a product she sells and had an awesome and anonymous donor MATCH the bid up to a certain price. God is so good!
• Pray endurance over us
• Pray protection from dark forces over our home- they find the tiniest crevice and weasel their way in and sometimes our hearts are busy or distracted and they stake a hold
• Pray for our marriage
• Pray wisdom for the doctors/ medical staff- open eyes and minds to holistic care
• Pray for a right perspective- our son is alive and thriving, his journey will end, we are impacting the Kingdom, we are prioritizing our priorities, we are grateful and appreciative of a simple life, we are grateful for what we have (people and things), we are learning what it's like to live on our knees in front of the Cross, we are being sanctified (which is painful and beautiful), we are growing in our relationship with each other, we are learning how important our family unit is beyond all the trapping of this world, we are making memories that will last a lifetime, we are building a legacy that we are proud of...
• Pray that we will never be blind to the divine appointment God places in our path
• Pray that I continue to be available to others who need help on their own health journey- I am passionate about helping people THRIVE in this life... cancer or no cancer.
• Pray as you feel led (always make room for the Holy Spirit to do its work)

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